I'm Nuts about these Nuts

The good folks at Diamond Foods have been making smoked almonds for as long as I can remember. That was pretty much the end of it; they came in regular and smoked. This brings to mind the following questions:

• Why smoked, why not boiled, dry roasted, honey roasted, or one of the other more traditional nut cooking methods?


• Do they smoke these in some sort of giant tee-pee, at the same time they do some fish and a couple of pigs, or just use smoke flavoring?


• Bill just used a semi colon... did he do it properly?

I can answer the last question - there are only eleven people on earth that know how to use a semi colon properly. Even fewer understand the balk rule. The intersection of these sets is rather odd, there is exactly one person on earth who understands exactly when to use a semi-colon and the balk rule. Oddly enough it is Russian dancer Mikhail Baryshnikov (Russian: Михаил Николаевич Барышников). I know what you're thinking... "Bill my 8th grade English teacher knew how to use a semi-colon." I'm sure she did, but I was talking about people. Also you're probably wondering why I included the Cyrillic version of Baryshnikov's name... I just think it looks cool.

Anyway, we were talking about nuts, and I think that Diamond Foods has come up with the greatest advance in nuts since the invention of dry roasting. Dry roasting is a process that I know nothing about, but I assume that Mr. Peanut was somehow involved. I suppose it could be reseached easily enought. Get back to me on that ok?

What Diamond came up with is the "Wasabi and Soy Sauce Almond". Why, I don't know. I hate to think 0f the ideas that must have failed - poodles may have been involved. But these have a sudden burst of horseradish that just sorta goes away, followed by almond flavor (which I think may actually be natural). I highly recommend them.

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