About a month ago, I was driving East of “the triangle” area of North Carolina. I was listening to Allan Handelman on 101.1. FM . Allan is actually listed in Talkers magazine's top 100 talk radio personalities in the country, although they seem to have misspelled his name. Somebody did, and I'm going to assume that his website is right. I used to like his show more than I do now, I think its because when he was on once a week on Sunday nights it was a little less time to fill and the guests and topics were better. Now he's on fifteen or twenty hours a week, and I find the topics and guests less interesting. In his defense, it is a lot of time to fill.
This particular Friday afternoon, he had Michael Molenda, the editor of Guitar Player magazine. As a guitar fanatic, I subscribed to Guitar Player for years, but I stopped reading it a few years ago. Still, I always enjoyed Mr. Molenda's editor notes. I had my family in the car. I suspect I'm not the only man who is occasionally both thankful for his family, and wants to be alone. Because as I was driving East I knew I would lose the radio station pretty soon, and my wife and kids would not stop talking so I could hear. I'm getting grouchier and grouchier and eventually I snap and start yelling for everybody to be quiet. It didn't seem like so much to ask. I do a lot of things for everybody else, I just wanted five to ten minutes of quiet. I didn't even need absolute silence, just enough that I could listen to the radio.
Finally, everybody is quiet. Its not because I yelled at them. Trust me,nobody cared. Maybe they were just all talked out. For whatever reason, there was enough quiet for me to hear the following conversation. Its paraphrased, but roughly speaking, this was it:
Allan Handelman: “Hi caller, you're on the air with Michael Molenda, the editor of Guitar Player magazine”
Caller: “Hi Allan. Love your show. Its great”
I probably shouldn't have included this part. As we all know there are strict FCC guidelines that state that all calls to a talk radio show must start this way.
Allan Handelman: “Thanks. Do you have a question for Michael Molenda, the editor of Guitar Player magazine?”
Caller: “Yeah, I was thinking that the problem with music today is that bands just don't stick together like they used to. Like remember when that drummer from Def Leppard lost his arm in a car accident I think it was? Or was it both arms? But they stuck with him..”
Michael Molenda: “Yeah, I uh....”
Ok, lets go back and focus on the obvious problem:
Caller: “... remember when that drummer from Def Leppard lost his arm...? Or was it both arms? But they stuck with him”
(crickets chirp)
Yeah, words escape me too. I don't remember exactly, but I'm pretty sure they escaped Michael Molenda too. It was the drummer with NO arms. This is what I raised my voice and told my family to be quiet for. Not to hear a good question for a guy with a lot of knowledge about guitars and guitar playing. Not to hear about the progression of Eddie Van Halen's playing through the 1980s. Not to hear about the advancements in digital modeling of classic amplifiers and effects. Not to hear about the return of guitar solos in rock music. I told everybody to be quiet so I could hear that the problem is that bands don't stick together. Like Def Leppard and their no armed drummer.
